Junior Wildmen 3-0 In D.A. N/a Police Dolts

Weather: Rain

Gate: 35k

Just as in the corresponding fixture between these two sides last season, the rain fell on Wild Stadium and on a sell-out crowd that left 6,000 turned away. This season, the Wildmen are again pressing for a post-season spot but unlike last term, the Dolts are still in with a shout themselves, being perfect through the first three matches. Last week's game against the Fabienettes suggested that the visitors might be beginning to wobble following the change of coach and the need for the players to adapt to a new playing style. The Wildmen may be undefeated as well but two consecutive draws versus the Mugaz and the Ultimates have caused some murmerings amongst those fans who remember the failure to qualify last season thanks to too many draws.

The Dolts came into the match with a clear game plan to be aggressive. Their initial defensive set-up was a full man front and a short kick. The Wildmen have a rightfully feared blocking unit simply due to their sheer size. That size was enough to keep the Dolts rush away form a bulkhead to protect the ball. Inevitably it was Speedy McSpeedy the Wildmen team captain and talisman who responded to the short kick but he took the slightly unusual step of his first one being backwards into the protection rather than immediately breaking for the opposition end zone. The backward step allowed the Zerg tactic to form. The front line players pushed their way slowly forward, taking up a stance just inside the Dolts half. Bodies were not being thrown about but Dolts players were being shoved aside to create the Zerg. The visitor's blocking unit could not make any impression on that formation and seemed slightly lost.

Rumbling forward with intent, the Wildmen began to turn up the pressure. An outstretched leg caught Dolts Norse Blitzer Sven Andersson while the Norseman was trying to slip a blocker and dodge away. The trip caught Andersson just as he was turning away, Badly Hurting him. This strike was followed almost immediately by two further hits. Lineman Mr Big Balls right at the front of the Zerg blocked down Troll Slayer Gordon Harbine and followed it up with a vicious stomp to the back of the head that left the Dolts medical team scrambling to patch Harbine up. Not satisfied with that, further punishment was inflicted through Lineman Brian O'Hanrahanrahan who took advantage of a lapse in concentration from his opposite number "Rob's" Gay Dad. Dad was not really paying attention near the sideline and that gave O'Hanrahanrahan all the time he needed to bundle into Dad from behind and shove him onto the Dolts bench. Dad collided with a sickening thud into Elron "Blessed Hands" as the Apothecary was administering treatment to Gordon Harbine. Dad was able to dust himself off and re-join the fray but Elron was not as fortunate. Being the only person available to provide medical attention, he could not treat himself as he lapsed out of consciousness forever. Elron was the first member of a coaching staff to die in the line of duty.

Taking advantage of the reduced defensive numbers, Speedy made his move towards the end zone. Speedy was un-opposed en route to his scoring destination. The Zerg had pushed forward and caused enough damage to give Speedy an easy path to the end zone. There was just time for one more knockout before the score. Dolts Lineman Rob "Bitch" Lanc tried to track back but found himself taken down from behind and concussed. Speedy secured his fifth score of the season and 17th all-time.

Knowing that there was not much time left in the first period, the Dolts were back on the field in a hurry with those players still fit enough to play. Against an another aggressive full front defence the Dolts aimed to hit back quickly. High Elf Thrower Tylana Sureflight took responsibility for the drive. He collected the ball and looked up to the action on the right flank where Chaos Warrior Snurg "The Great" was busy creating holes for other players to run through. Knowing that time was tight, Sureflight attempted to get the ball out to the wing as early as he could. In his haste, Sureflight had not managed to secure the necessary degree of accuracy and the ball passed over the heads of his targets and into neutral territory. The overshot meant that it would take a desperate play from to make amends but that desperate play failed badly when Wood Elf Catcher and the Dolts top scorer in 2003, Salina Black over-exerted herself and crashed down to the turf. The Wildmen made Black pay for that through Speedy McSpeedy. The High Elf Catcher is known for his rushing and scoring prowess but he led the team in knockdown ratio through 2003 and has a clear mean streak. Rushing up and sliding boots first into the head of Salina Black, the foul Badly Hurt the Wood Elf and gave Speedy his first ever Casualty.

The foul was the last meaningful play of the half and it ended at 1-0 to the home side. The Dolts had not been able to cope with the physicality of the Wildmen play, a far cry from the Fabienettes and their free flowing Blood Bowl that the Dolts new head coach had seen last week. The loss of Elron "Blessed Hands" will have been a major blow to a team already struggling with the dominating play of their opponents. It was looking very good for the Wildmen.

Coming out for the second half, the rowdy Wild Stadium crowd were clearly hyped up. Having only drawn their previous home match, against the Mugaz and in disappointing circumstances, the fans were clearly desperate for a win. That mood became nasty as the Dolts came out of the tunnel. A few dozen fans managed to break the security cordon and pile onto the pitch, they got their hands on Orc Blitzer Smack and Halfling Snot who were both knocked out amid a melee of swinging arms, legs and other. The cause was looking somewhat lost for the visitors but to their credit they continued to gamely press for an equaliser. Tylana Sureflight again collected the kick-off and rolled out towards the right where Witch Elf "High" Lady Venice was in waiting. Unfortunately for the Dolts, Tylana Sureflight seemingly didn't have his passing mits on and fumbled his effort away.

The fumble became a turnover thanks to Speedy McSpeedy. The Speedy one blitzed in to clear Tylana away and to open up a path to the ball for himself. He was unable to take it at the first attempt but did gather the rock in at the second before heading upfield. The rest of the Wildmen team were unable to back Speedy up and this time, he was not quite able to do it all by himself. "High" Lady Venice was quick to spot the obvious danger and tracked back. She reached around and flicked the ball from Speedy's grasp. That was enough for Venice to mount a brief one-player fightback. Venice rushed into Wildmen territory but only got a few yards more before finding herself surrounded. She had to find someone else to take the load but could not get the ball under control enough to find another player, instead another fumble ensued.

Venice had managed to get out of her own half and so made the Wildmen work for their second touchdown. Amazon Thrower Lisa Furykup swept in to gather the ball and complete a short pass to Speedy. A few yards later and the second touchdown was in the books. It would be a remarkable comeback for the Dolts from two down though that exact comeback did occur against the Mugaz but that side hd far more of their players still intact than this one. With rain pouring down even harder, the bedraggled Dolts could only field 9 players for the next kick-off. At that number, gaps are always going to be evident even without the further damage that they took from an injury to Rob "Bitch" Lanc courtesy of Troll Blocker Mr Wildman.

The remainder of the game should have been a formality but the rain made things difficult for the ball-handlers. For the Dolts, Tylana Sureflight could not take the ball but then neither could Lisa Furykup for the hosts. A series of fumbles made for sloppy play until Speedy stepped in to bring a bit more class to the proceedings. He scooped up the ball despite a couple of tackle zones, burst free and over the line for his third score of the day and to end the game at 3-0 to the Wildmen. In doing so, Speedy passed 100 rushing yards for the season in just 4 games and took his all-time rushing yardage to 399.

Speedy was just too good for the Dolts this time but then so was the physicality of blocking unit. The Dolts have suffered their first non-win of the campaign in what is probably a sign that the coaching upheaval at the club is a risk to their effectiveness this year. Suffering the loss of their Apothecary will be a blow to the team who must now surely look to fill that hole as soon as possible. The Wildmen though will be pleased to have defeated a team that secured a damaging draw in 2003 and to have established a dominating display of strength including 54 Blocks with which to wow the rest of the league.

Injuries: None

MVPS: Lisa Furykup, Smack

Best Players

Speedy McSpeedy: 3 TDs, 1CAS, 4 Rushes for 34 yards, 1 Reception for 4 yards, 2 Blocks, 1 Down, 1 Foul, 1 Damage, 2 Fumbles
Mr Wildman: 1 CAS, 10 Blocks, 4 Downs
Brian O'Hanrahanrahan: 1 CAS, 1 Block, 1 Down, 1 Foul, 1 Damage