New England Patriot Missiles 2-1 Revengers' Tragedy

Week 1: 08/06/06

Referee Weather Gate
Camelia Sackville
Normal
86k

The clash between the two top sides in the ADF South last season was the first match for the 2005 champions Revengers' Tragedy to parade their trophy. Although it has been difficult for teams to retain the title, the Tragedy have been installed as favourites but an up and coming Patriot Missiles franchise promise not to be a pushover within the Conference this year.

A Conference record 86,000 fans were on hand in what ended up as something of an upset. The upstart Missiles side defeated Tragedy by two touchdowns to one, and were helped in part by their rabid support. Tragedy's all-time top scorer Kyle was the first to suffer, damaged severely by fans inside Linkhor Phen when he spurned a golden scoring opportunity in favour of racing into the crowd besotted by some vision of beauty. An invasion later in the game saw the same fate befall Tragedy's playmaker, Tor. It was only medical support from both team's camps that has enabled these two star players to survive and likely play again.

Despite the crowd violence, it was still a very close game with a last turn interception from Two Jabz preventing an equalising score after the home team had come from behind to take a second half lead through veteran Kinochit and first round Krush signing Slinky McVelvet. The game also featured the first ever occurance in the league of a ball bursting as Scratty Backflush looked likely to score in the first half. The game was also notable for the incredible number of dodges posted by Tragedy. The 32 successful dodges is believed to be an all-time single game record.

David Varney will miss the upcoming fixture against Arkasha Principals in Week 2 due to being press-ganged by the Imperial Navy immediately prior to the match and subsequent to widely reported escapades in the drinking dens around Linkor. At the conclusion of the match, Tragedy agreed to trade Krush signing Mr Trick to the Missiles in a deal reputed to involve the acquisition of services rather than goods.

Tragedy's defeat means they fall one game short of the all-time record undefeated streak for both all-time and the regular season. In the midst of a dodging frenzy, Penn has now gone through 50 all-time dodges. Tor is the third passer ever to throw for more than 100 yards in a career, following Arda and Johnny Bomb.

 

GAME STATS

 
Scoring
TDs
CAS
CMP
INT
Kinochit
1
0
0
0
Slinky McVelvet
1
0
0
0
Billy Mahonie
0
1
1
0
Goale Ong
0
0
2
0
Two Jabz
0
0
2
1
Total
2
3
3
1
Rushing
Rush
Att
Dodge
Fall
Kinochit
8
1
0
0
Slinky McVelvet
8
1
0
0
Scratty Backflush
6
1
4
1
Quagmire Giggity
3
1
0
1
Goale Ong
1
2
2
0
Billy Mahonie
0
0
2
2
Drexl
0
0
2
1
Lester Hayfriends
0
0
1
0
Jane
0
0
1
0
Paul Grey
0
0
1
0
       
Total
38
4
7
1
Blocking
Block
Down
T
S
Two Jabz
8
5
0
0
Lester Hayfriends
7
1
0
1
Paul Grey
6
3
0
0
Hacken Slazch
4
2
0
1
Quagmire Giggity
4
0
0
3
Drexl
3
3
1
1
Kinochit
3
1
0
1
Dave Hartnett
2
2
0
2
Billy Mahonie
1
1
1
5
Goale Ong
1
1
0
1
Scratty Backflush
0
0
0
1
Johnny Danger
0
0
0
1
Total
40
20
2
18
Passing
Yds
Cmp
Att
Int'd
Goale Ong
20
2
4
0
Billy Mahonie
2
1
1
0
Total
22
3
5
0
Receiving/Handling
Yds
Rec
Att
Fum
Quagmire Giggity
12
1
1
0
Scratty Backflush
8
1
1
0
Kinochit
2
1
1
0
Billy Mahonie
0
0
0
2
Johnny Danger
0
0
0
2
Paul Grey
0
0
0
1
Dave Hartnett
0
0
0
1
Drexl
0
0
0
1
Total
22
3
3
7
Fouling
Foul
Dam
S/O
 
Snotzuki
1
1
0
Total
1
1
0
 
Scoring
TDs
CAS
CMP
INT
Luke
1
0
0
0
Tor
0
0
2
0
         
         
         
Total
1
0
2
0
Rushing
Rush
Att
Dodge
Fall
Tor
15
2
0
0
Holden Webster
5
1
9
0
Kyle
2
1
0
0
Luke
0
0
4
0
Sunday
0
0
2
0
Landok
0
0
1
1
Numfar
0
0
1
0
Dodd
0
0
1
0
Penn
-1
1
12
0
Mr Trick
-1
1
2
0
Marti
-1
1
0
0
Total
19
7
32
1
Blocking
Block
Down
T
S
Luke
5
4
2
2
Dodd
5
3
0
1
Holden Webster
4
3
2
1
Sunday
4
1
0
0
Tucker
4
1
0
1
Landok
3
1
0
2
Numfar
3
1
0
2
Kwelthorne
3
1
0
0
Penn
2
2
0
0
Larry
2
1
0
0
Mr Trick
0
0
0
1
       
Total
35
18
4
10
Passing
Yds
Cmp
Att
Int'd
Tor
14
2
2
0
Sunday
0
0
1
1
Mr Trick
0
0
1
0
Total
14
2
4
1
Receiving/Handling
Yds
Rec
Att
Fum
Kyle
8
1
1
1
Luke
6
1
1
0
Holden Webster
0
0
0
2
Marti
0
0
0
1
       
       
       
         
Total
14
2
2
4
Fouling
Foul
Dam
S/O
       
Total
0
0
0